Every so often, writers need to belly up to the bountiful table of blessings because, let's face it, the starlight moments are few and far between. It's easy to let the weight of the literary world, with all it's rules and rejections, take us far from our intended course. With that in mind, and before the tryptophan short circuits creative thought and lapses me into a food coma, I offer up a Vortex 10 filled with writerly blessings.
Top Ten Reasons My Muse is Thankful:
1. We collaborate on love scenes unworthy of The Literary Review's Bad Sex in Fiction Prize.
2. I do not beg for clarity of thought from her at ungodly pre-dawn hours.
3. My DVR stash/Netflix account is a See's Candy Store of visual hero inspiration. And no calories!
4. My large-capacity water heater is golden for those lengthy plot-pondering sessions in the shower.
5. My glee is not found in typical female traps-handbags, Jimmy Choos, maid service-but in office supplies so she can vomit organizational details in technicolor.
6. When the perky spinning instructor at the gym shouts, "You can see the finish line," the muse and I SO know it's not about visualizing a country road through a vineyard. We hear "You can see the signature line!" and "You can see the B&N book signing line!"
7. I don't go all postal on her when she va-cays for a few days. Even muses need mental health days.
8. I respect that she's trying to boldly go where no one has gone before.
9. Her people-watching skills have elevated waiting in a public place to an art form. Who needs CNN at the airport when we have Larry the Disenfranchised Horse Jockey carrying a Euro-bag housing a suspicious device?
10. From the time we became acquainted, I've never once abandoned her.
For my American friends, I hope you have an amazing Thanksgiving weekend. For all others, I hope you, too, find a quiet moment filled with peace and blessings.