Monday, August 11, 2008

Ten Things a Romance Novel Hero Would Never Say

Its Monday. Time for fun and another interactive day here at the Vortex.

My theory on what women want can be summed up in two words: romance novel. Not necessarily for the hero's bulging biceps and rogue tendencies, but for all he doesn't say. By and large these stories are written by women for women. Where else can men get a comprehensive study like that--Men's Health? Yeah, right. Way off. Way.

So, we collectively offer up ten heady doses of reality, ones that chase away any notion of fantasy. I'll start.

Ten Things A Romance Novel Hero Would Never Say:

1. "I'm taking the Browns to the Superbowl." And he isn't talking football.

Who's next?

More Longmire Does Romance Covers


Jen FitzGerald said...

Man, L.A., I've been wracking my brain for a really good one, but I'm coming up blank.



Anonymous said...

"Not tonight, honey, I have a headache."

Melanie Atkins said...

"Honey, did you pack the Viagra?" LOL

L.A. Mitchell said...

3. Cramps, Shmamps. I've fought an entire brigade of blood-thirsty soldiers with a lance in my thigh!

Stewart Sternberg said...

"Does it look strange when I do this?"

Sue L said...

Haha! Not tonight dear is the one I was going to list. But I see that must be a favorite.

Actually, could be quite noble of a guy to turn down a lady under the right, wrong circumstances. ;)

So the thing I think a romantic hero would never say: "Yes, it was fun, but your sister is much more bendy."

L.A. Mitchell said...

These are great :) How about:

6. "My stallion is not accustomed to carrying such weight."

Sandra Ferguson said...

OMG -- these are laugh out loud funny.

How about: do the pants make my butt look big?

Pam said...

"You're wearing that?"

or, for the historical fans...

"Taste this meat. Has it spoiled?"

This was fun--thanks! And I loved that cover!

Mary Malcolm said...

"Honey, you look a little dumpy in that sweater..."


"After you finish cooking dinner and doing the dishes, will you iron my clothes so I have something to wear tomorrow? It's been a week..."

L.A. Mitchell said...

We ended with 11! Such witty readers to have on board. Thanks, everyone, for participating :)

Stewart Sternberg said...

Taste my meat, has it spoiled?????? That one had me choking. I applaud. Hilarious. Good post, great comments.