Dear Joe

To the contractor today in Starbucks who was pitching his job quote to a potential client: I'm sorry. I couldn't help eavesdropping. It really had nothing to do with your decidedly non-local dialect or that sprawling sun tattoo on your forearm or the fact that my characters had left me iced and unfocused for several days. Mostly, it was your gender.

See, I took this class not long ago on how to write male characters in a romance novel so they're believable. Authentic. And I'm not one for absolutes, but certain things stuck in my brain. Like the fact that men rarely end a statement with a question. So when my hero, in the course of a heated conversation, committed this dialogue foul three times, I was concerned he'd have to check his man card at the door.

Exhibit A:

"That's what happened to my father, isn't it?"

I'm told men don't speak like this. I saw you there in your print screened concrete manufacturing shirt, and I looked to you for authority. You're everyday Joe. I was listening for something definitive. Permission for my hero to ask that question about his father. Yes, he could phrase it differently, but that would mean giving into absolutes. I wanted you to ask something like, "We could take down the wall there, don't you think?" or "You can stay the night somewhere else, can't you?" But you never did, Joe. Not once did you end on a question because that would be playing your I'm-not-sure-about-this card, and it would have lacked confidence. Confidence is the number one prerequisite for a contractor. And a romance novel hero. But you probably already knew that.

It's a fine line, Joe. Striking a balance between the authentic male and the one we women fantasize about that doesn't belch the alphabet or scratch himself in public. You, sir, were my hero today for just being you. I hope you got the job.

Party Time

Drinks are on the house for our first ever Character Party, lasting all weekend long. If yours wants to mingle, email me your character's name, photo you use for inspiration and a line of dialogue overheard at the party (la-mitchell@la-mitchell.com). A click on the (...) will take you to the character's creator.


"This 'rusty nail' concoction is proving stronger than Dr. Morton's Ether Dome at Massachusetts General." ~Michael Koristiaan (...)











"Ah might could have another one of those crab cake Hors d'oeuvres. Now, you want my opinion? Invest your stimulus package deal into waste management. Garbage is always a growth industry." ~Curtis Waggstaff (...)







"Gimme a fast car, a woman who isn't a witch from hell and a good burger--not necessarily in that order." ~Dean Winchester (...)











"My current project is like Blair Witch meets the original Friday the 13th, except not so funny. And with zombies. I'm opposed to all traditional distribution. We'll be leaving bits of the 16 millimeter out-takes in bus stations to create a grassroots following. Where's the restroom?" ~Roz Denks (...)






"Even teaching can be outsourced. Kids get tutored online via Bangalore. Summer classes, college prep: all online. I have to bring
added value to the classroom to stay relevant. By the way, this Pinot Noir is excellent." ~Esteban Quiroga (...)




"A man could lose himself out west. Disappear, if he wanted." ~Chester A. Farr (...)












"You got a beer?" ~Chaz Trahan (...)

Your Villian is Invited, Too

We're going to try an experiment here next Friday, a mixer of sorts for the characters populating our current novels. Scan photos or send me links (la-mitchell@la-mitchell.com) to those people who inspire you as you're writing a scene. If you're a reader, send who your mind's eye pictured for a character. Include the name of the character and one line of dialogue they're most likely to be overheard speaking at a party. Let's see what kind of crowd we can gather.