Favorites: Ten Things a Romance Novel Hero Would Never Say

It's day two of The Great Blog Spiff and this afternoon's re-post is one of my favorites because it was a true collective effort. Not only does it still make me laugh, but how awesome that Vortexers wrote it together. From August 11, 2008...

Ten Things a Romance Novel Hero Would Never Say

Its Monday. Time for fun and another interactive day here at the Vortex.

My theory on what women want can be summed up in two words: romance novel. Not necessarily for the hero's bulging biceps and rogue tendencies, but for all he doesn't say. By and large these stories are written by women for women. Where else can men get a comprehensive study like that--Men's Health? Yeah, right. Way off. Way.

So, we collectively offer up ten heady doses of reality, ones that chase away any notion of fantasy. I'll start.

1. "I'm taking the Browns to the Superbowl." And he isn't talking football.

Who's next?

Comment from June:
2. "Not tonight, honey, I have a headache."

Comment from Melanie:
3. "Honey, did you pack the Viagra?" LOL

Comment from L.A:
4. "Cramps, Shmamps. I've fought an entire brigade of blood-thirsty soldiers with a lance in my thigh!"

Comment from Stewart:
5. "Does it look strange when I do this?"

Comment from Sue L:
6. "Yes, it was fun, but your sister is much more bendy."



Comment from L.A:
7. "My stallion is not accustomed to carrying such weight."


Comment from Sandra:
8. "Do these pants make my butt look big?"

Comment from Pam:

9. "You're wearing that?"

or, for the historical fans...

10. "Taste this meat. Has it spoiled? 

 

Comment from Mary:

11. "Honey, you look a little dumpy in that sweater..."
Or

12. "After you finish cooking dinner and doing the dishes, will you iron my clothes so I have something to wear tomorrow? It's been a week..."

C'mon, Vortexers.  We can add to this can't we? Go for it...

More Longmire Does Romance book covers