Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Romance Writer Barbie
This is my dear sweet critique partner, Sandra, holding her birthday gift from moi. If only Mattel fully realized the market potential of Romance Writer Barbie. click photo to enlarge
The inspiration came while thumbing through a Redbook last Friday at the hair salon. As it turns out, Barbie and Sandra share more than strawberry blond locks-they share a birthday. Who knew a weekend playing Barbie could be so much fun?
I pared down Barbie's usual fashionista attire to reflect the true fashion-sense of romance writers at work: baggy sweat pants and sloppy shirts. And don't all romance writers have mismatched socks? Oh wait, that's just me. Rounding out Barbie's couture is a lopsided half-ponytail rammed home with the dreaded red editing pencil and a rejection letter in hand. Yet, Barbie is still smiling.
What would Romance Writer Barbie be without accessories? I opted to re-paper the opulent pink and white polka dot chandelier-ed background in favor of a muted pallate of builder beige walls. Barbie is creating art. She has no time for Home-Depot-like pursuits. Set against this backdrop, a framed portrait of the Queen of Romance, Nora Roberts, a plotting board with technicolor Post-Its and a shelf crowded with books like Deb Dixon's Goal, Motivation and Conflict, and Sandra's Wild Rose Press release, Harm's Way. A hairy-chested Tom Selleck photograph in a gilded frame rounds out the decor.
On her desk, which she's told is pink but has yet to confirm, the essentials of her craft: laptop, notepad, coffee, pencils and Sherrilyn Kenyon's Fantasy Lover for inspiration. Though the disproportionate Oreo cookie I found in the dollhouse section of Hobby Lobby would have been the piece de resistance of the romance writer's day, it simply would have been large enough to consume her face. Writers have enough difficulty prying their arses from the chair without adding that kind of baggage.
From the photograph I noticed Barbie has broken free of her plastic ankle shackles and is now standing a bit off-kilter. This frees her to channel every romance writer I've ever known at one time or another.
May she inspire future generations of girls to bookish fantasies of RITA awards, Lifetime movies and NYTimes Bestseller lists!