Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Romance Writer Barbie

This is my dear sweet critique partner, Sandra, holding her birthday gift from moi. If only Mattel fully realized the market potential of Romance Writer Barbie. click photo to enlarge

The inspiration came while thumbing through a Redbook last Friday at the hair salon. As it turns out, Barbie and Sandra share more than strawberry blond locks-they share a birthday. Who knew a weekend playing Barbie could be so much fun?

I pared down Barbie's usual fashionista attire to reflect the true fashion-sense of romance writers at work: baggy sweat pants and sloppy shirts. And don't all romance writers have mismatched socks? Oh wait, that's just me. Rounding out Barbie's couture is a lopsided half-ponytail rammed home with the dreaded red editing pencil and a rejection letter in hand. Yet, Barbie is still smiling.

What would Romance Writer Barbie be without accessories? I opted to re-paper the opulent pink and white polka dot chandelier-ed background in favor of a muted pallate of builder beige walls. Barbie is creating art. She has no time for Home-Depot-like pursuits. Set against this backdrop, a framed portrait of the Queen of Romance, Nora Roberts, a plotting board with technicolor Post-Its and a shelf crowded with books like Deb Dixon's Goal, Motivation and Conflict, and Sandra's Wild Rose Press release, Harm's Way. A hairy-chested Tom Selleck photograph in a gilded frame rounds out the decor.

On her desk, which she's told is pink but has yet to confirm, the essentials of her craft: laptop, notepad, coffee, pencils and Sherrilyn Kenyon's Fantasy Lover for inspiration. Though the disproportionate Oreo cookie I found in the dollhouse section of Hobby Lobby would have been the piece de resistance of the romance writer's day, it simply would have been large enough to consume her face. Writers have enough difficulty prying their arses from the chair without adding that kind of baggage.

From the photograph I noticed Barbie has broken free of her plastic ankle shackles and is now standing a bit off-kilter. This frees her to channel every romance writer I've ever known at one time or another.

May she inspire future generations of girls to bookish fantasies of RITA awards, Lifetime movies and NYTimes Bestseller lists!


Maureen McGowan said...

Adorable. Aren't you a great friend and CP. Too cool.

Pamela Cayne said...

OMG--I love the plotting board! L.A. you are too perfect.

Wait, I take that back. Shouldn't Barbie have a little MP3 player with "Together Forever" for inspiration? Or does Ric-Rolled Barbie sound too porno?

Sherry Davis said...

LA, you are ingenious. And speaking as one who witnessed the unveiling of Romance Writer Barbie, I can tell you it was very detailed. She's a treasure Sandra will place on a shelf for all to see (no touching!).

That was a great party. If I were the judge, LA's gift won first prize for originality.

Miladysa said...

Absolutely fabulous!

Well done :D

the walking man said...

...and there it is, that board with all the post it notes trying to keep the story on track.

Jen FitzGerald said...

Love it, L.A.!


Charles Gramlich said...

That's cool. Makes me think for some reason of "Romancing the Stone," which I thought was a very good movie.

L.A. Mitchell said...

Maureen...thank you :)

Pamela...try as I did, I couldn't come up with anything resembling an MP3. I know most writers use them. I'm partial to "tomb" myself. I *do* think we should make a "Rick Rolled" Ken. What do you think?

Sherry...what a fun party. You did a super job.

Miladysa and Jen..thanks :)

Walking Man...I did leave out the Post-its stuck to her feet. When she gets melodramatic about where her plot is going and begins rearranging, she casts them to the floor in crumpled bundles for the cats to bat around.

Charles...a true man can embrace his love for that movie. Good for you ;)

Sue L said...

Truly a priceless gift!!!

Vesper said...

I love it!!! Romance Writing Barbie... so cool! :-)

Sandra Ferguson said...

Yes, she's the coolest, and no she isn't for sale . . . I don't care what you bid on EBAY.

LA forgot to mention the rejection, RWB is holding in her handing -- not the smile still in place. As one with many rejections in a file, I can honestly attest the smile is more 'grit of my teeth than grin of my lips' No, you can't steal that -- it's already in my current WIP, but the point is the rejection and hanging onto the smile.

Also, she didn't mention the shirt RWB is wearing, which happens to be a Texas A & M MOM shirt. You betcha, I am and darn proud to associate through my daughter finishing her junior year.

It is not only creative, but truly thoughtful and will proudly be showcased in my home for many years.

Thanks, LA. And special thanks to your sweet daughter for sharing one of her Barbie's with me.